Tuesday, April 20, 2010

i'm going back to the start.

I'm currently working on my first written assignment in two years (thus the lack of posts lately!) but just wanted to share- I forgot what it was like to write like this.

The nervousness of sitting in front of a blank screen, and the challenge that awaits of drawing out things to say that aren't completely banal (the first sentence I write is usually the most banal thing ever written, but it must be got out to get past it!)

The slow build as you realise that there IS something you have to say and it IS coming out, sure enough.

And the quiet euphoria that awakens when you draw back for a nanosecond and realise you have been writing, completely writing, for minutes on end and it's good work. Blissful.

Bliss that's broken by a neurotic compulsion to do something, anything to get away from the desk- more tea (but you don't want one.) Trip to the bathroom? (don't need to- but maybe you should walk over, just in case?) A five minute break- just five minutes, I can take five minutes! (Which is disproved half an hour later when you look at your watch, silently praying that it's not past 11.30am because that will mean you really HAVE come off the rails. 11.42am? really?)

So my question (I do have one!) is this: why, when writing is so deeply satisfying and so essential when a deadline is looming (day after tomorrow, thanks for asking) is it so flipping hard to keep at it? Older, wiser, further-along-in-your-studies-er people, this one's for you!

2 comments:

  1. Hey Rosie! I'm sure you've read this already but I thought this was both pertinent to your topic and something that struck a chord with me. Damn that Tavi, bein' all awesome and insightful.


    "So who today is against the grain?

    "First of all when I was young there were juvenile delinquents and there were beatniks; then there were hippies, then there was punk, then there was grunge, then there was gangsta. Well what is it now? Nothing! Come up with something! Get busy! It’s your duty!" -John Waters to RUSSH Magazine

    I'm sorry John Waters but I don't know if we can! Anything underground catches on too quickly because of the internet, and is soon enough something to make into a product, create a cultural stereotype around, or a topic a fancy grown-up will ruin with some article that misses the point completely!"

    <3(Yas)

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  2. So interesting, hey, Yas! This idea of the underground being usurped by the internet... i mean, with style blogging, it's already "over ground" because it's in the public domain, so was it ever hidden? Or could we call it 'hidden' because the majority of people didn't know about it? And what's crazy to think is that about sixty years ago, punks, for example, were visble on the streets, but that visibility was limited by place. Now, a subculture can form online and be visible across the globe as it happens... kind of changes what 'underground' might mean, perhaps?
    ps. that was a great issue of RUSSH!
    ps. thanks for reading

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